Posts Tagged ‘zen’
A blank piece of paper, and a pencil. That’s all it took for the truth to come out.
My head, connected to the big bubble.
My heart, my guts, my hands, and my feet, in another space altogether.
In my green memory bank, today I retrieved a moment long ago, with my parents, walking up a path, in the French Alps. The image is fuzzy, there are pine trees towering over us, and forming an imaginary kingdom. The damp earth is soft under my feet, and I take in the smell of possibility of mushrooms. Drunk from the mountain air, I feel happy, totally.
What is in your green memory bank? How many moments, stored away, and still potent with the intensity of childhood, can you go back to? And access the love you felt in the midst of nature.
Out to get the Sunday papers, I am welcomed by the sound of birds singing high up in the bare trees across the street. Soon I hear a symphony, of birds far and near, competing for my attention. And the thought, what would happen if, one day, all the birds vanished?
Foot step, foot step, foot step, . . . all I can hear is the sound of my foot steps. The soles of my shoes, hitting the pavement. Feet, shoes, cement. And the earth, underneath. Two levels removed. Foot step, foot step, foot step, . . .
Mind filled with worries, I am inside. Until I remember to look up, and notice the trees, and down, boring earth, shriveled leaves, in between cement. The smell of nature, mixed in with man made elements. Baily, pulling me. She thinks we are going right. No, today we will turn around. I am in a hurry to go home.
Back in April, I started this blog on a whim. I was getting annoyed by all the self righteousness in the green media. And I wanted to offer a counterpoint. My reality as a less than perfect Green Girl Wannabe, who just couldn’t get her act together. There is nothing like political correctness to bring out my rebellious streak. I went a bit overboard at first, and chose to focus solely on the bad stuff, all the things I did not, should have done in the name of a greener planet. What happened next, were some twists and turns, stories, topics, people that I had not anticipated, and turned out to be a lot more interesting than my original scheme. Interesting to me, at least!
There is Green Guru, of course. Green Guru started as Prad, my husband. Very quickly, it became obvious that the name Prad alone did not suffice to capture his authoritative green essence. I can’t even remember when he reached Green Guru status, but from then on, our roles became clear. He is Green Guru, and I am Green Girl Wannabe. Scenes from our domestic life pervades my blog, and I don’t see that changing any time soon.
Another twist has been the gradual opening of my views to include, not just self-deprecating moments, but also, pretty much any daily events that permeate my life, still using the green lens. I used to refer to this blog, as ‘The Daily Sins of a Green Girl Wannabe’. I just renamed it, ‘The Hours of a Green Girl Wannabe’. To make room for all the small acts, the encounters, the random thoughts, the myriad of feelings, the ahah moments, the discoveries, that fill up my busy bee days. La Marguerite is becoming a zen, feminist, philosophical, practical, humble green blog. The place to share all of my reality, as a Green Girl Wannabe.
What’s coming next, is a better blog hopefully. One where my voice can be heard more clearly. One where readers can find more things to take back with them. Like anything worthwhile, it’s going to take a lot of work. I have already started. What motivates me, is the desire to make a difference, and to become a more active node in the world wide green web.
‘In the Clouds, Sitting Watch Over Paradise‘, the front page article in yesterday’s New York Times, introduced me to the fascinating world of Mike Gates, one of the remaining 800 lookouts in the United States. Mr. Gates lives high up in a shack atop the mountain. His job is to spend most of his waking hours, scanning the Lake Tahoe landscape for possible fire smoke. Like him, I have been spending a lot of my time lately, scanning the landscape, and looking out for evidence. The only difference is, I am looking inside, trying to stay mindful of all the thoughts, feelings, that keep me in a state of Green Girl Wannabe.